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This is a collection of satirical, anecdotal and sometime nautical conversations and other articles and short stories, expressed through the eyes of The Navigator and featuring The Captain and assorted Fans and Floozies, some of whom might actually exist.

 captain  understood
 The Captain

Our action hero thrives on hardship and adventure but don’t be deceived by this photo, the captain has extremely good vision. Why else would he be sitting on a beach at an undisclosed destination hiding from the sun and pretending that he does not exist!

 The Navigator

“After many failed voyages the captain conceded that he needed my navigational skills in order to survive. So, I kitted up and after several false starts, decided to change my stylist. I am now truly the man-about-town and ready to set sail at dawn.”

 gap  shakira
 The Fan

“This is a recent picture of me enjoying my early retirement on a desert island. You can see how happy I am with my new carefree lifestyle catching lizards, eating purity foods and sucking coconuts. Come and join me when you are in town and I will introduce you to local cuisine”

 The Floozie

The navigator claims that in his youth he met her one steamy night in a boat off the coast of Columbia, where they made love and sang duets under the stars. However, the captain calculates that she would have been about four years old at the time and suggests that this claim is “highly delusional”.